...i'm in a New York state of mind...

So here I am in NYC. As I return from Peru I cannot fully appreciate my new love and hatred for humanity. It is such an interesting dynamic that I feel about the essence that makes us who we are. On one hand I love humanity. I love how we can relate to others and the fact that we all have emotions and a soul and an image made in the likeness of God himself. I have prayed over the past year that God would, as Dustin Kensrue of Thrice puts it, "refine hate and love." I certainly feel a love for people now more than ever. I am not sure exactly how or if the conditions and living in Peru gave me this new found love, but I know it is of God. I see people and I just realize their pains and their joys and their desperate need for a Savior. I see people and I see their complete joy and sufferings living in the comforting hands of God. I am learning how to love. Certainly if I do not have love, I have nothing.

I hate as well. I hate humanity and the essence of humanity at times. I hate our frailness, rebellion, and stubbornness. I hate this in myself and others. I know I do not hate the person though, for this would be a grave sin. I hate most of all sin. Is not this simple word the characteristic of our world and does not all downfall, pain, and death come from this simple word? It is interesting to see that God would allow sin. How can we realize redemption without something to be redeemed from? If I do not hate that which is evil, I do not align myself with a utmost important characteristic of the Most High God.

God certainly has fallen afresh on me (to steal more of Thrice's lyrics...I am such a fanboy) this summer.

I think I will try and go get my computer fixed and get these bug bites to stop itching.


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